One of the biggest questions that any married couple will have to face is, “what should be the do’s and don’ts of divorce?” While most people (for the most part) can agree on some of the do’s and don’ts of divorce, there are a few points where two or more divorcing spouses might differ. So here are some things for you to look at when making decisions about your own divorce.
* Communicate: The most important thing about communicating with your spouse is that you two have to talk! Unless you two can come to an agreement on key issues such as child custody, the division of assets, alimony, and the like, it will be very difficult for you to save your marriage if your communication has stalled. Be prepared to talk to your spouse about all of the key issues in your divorce. You need to hear what he or she thinks, feels, and hopes you have about the marriage.
* Give each other space: As soon as you decide to file for divorce you should give each other some space. This means you should not be contacting your spouse. If you have children together, you might want to send them to see their grandparents. Keep phone calls and email requests to a minimum, and if you must speak to your spouse, speak quietly and privately. You should give your spouse the space he or she needs as he or she starts to heal from the divorce.
* Understand the importance of settlement and trial: When it comes to dividing up the marital assets and determining the final settlement amounts, you will need to have a full understanding of how settlement works and who will be liable for whom during the trial. You will also need to understand that in certain states, the jury will be able to make its decision on its own and without the help of the attorneys. It is important for you to get this understanding before you file for divorce. In the event of a trial, it is very important for your attorney to guide the jury towards the right decision.
* Avoid making impulsive decisions: Impulsive decisions are not the do’s when it comes to dealing with a divorce. The most impulsive decision you should avoid is making decisions about your divorce based solely on your interest, wants, or needs of your spouse. The best decision you can make is to communicate your concerns to your spouse at a time when you are not emotionally available. Make sure your spouse fully understands what you are telling him or her and that you understand what he or she is telling you.
One of the most important do’s and don’ts of divorce is learning to keep your emotions in check. Emotional overreactions are the most common reasons why divorces fail. Therefore, you will need to learn how to remain calm when dealing with your spouse. You can do this by exercising more patience and showing more respect for your spouse’s desires and needs. It may be hard to do at first, but if you want to succeed in your divorce proceedings, then you must become a better, calmer person. After all, divorce is not something that you decide upon randomly; it requires much thought and consideration.
